My Mask

“What they don’t know won’t hurt them” – ha! Too many times have I heard this said about a situation. Masking the truth is something that happens much to frequently in my life. Maybe it’s what comes with being at an all-girls’ school – lot’s of gossiping, rumours, and secrets. Maybe it’s each person using their personal mask and creating a hyperbolic mask from it.

I mask the truth more than I care to admit. I’m not a liar, I merely withhold information when it is not needed. Maybe you consider this lying, maybe you don’t…but I don’t. This is by no means me saying that masking the truth is good. Often, it can actually be worse than being upfront.

My personal mask is that of hiding my stress and worries. I worry about making others worry over my stress so I don’t tell them which then causes me more stress – it’s an endless cycle, I know. As much as I want to let people know why or even that I’m feeling stressed, I  often keep it in in order to save them from worry. Of course, the times I have informed someone, I have instantly felt ten thousand times better for getting it off my chest.

This is the reason I have become a mentor at school, so that students can talk to me about their worries and feel better for getting it off their chest, let alone the feelings when we manage to find an effective solution.

Thank you for reading

x

 

A Letter To Myself (Continued)

Hello again!

After last night’s post I’ve been feeling very positive yet nostalgic and was looking through some old documents on my computer. Over the summer I began writing some poetry and found one entitled Letter To Myself and thought I’d share it with you all to help you get to know me in a way. I’m not sure what inspired me to write this at the time but I can say I still feel the same way now. Please let me know what you think and maybe I’ll share some more poems in the near future.

Dear me,
Be confident in everything you do,
Never restrict yourself.
Always look at the best in people,
And place everything into perspective.
Don’t be afraid to ask for help,
No matter how trivial the issue.
And most importantly,
Never forget to tell those you love,
What they really mean to you.

Thank you for reading x

A Letter To Myself – 1 Year From Now

Hi Debbi,

 Firstly, good luck in your exams, I know you’ll be wanting to hear that.

Secondly, I know that, like most years, you’ll think the previous school-year was terrible, I’m going to remind you why it wasn’t…

You had (and hopefully still have) the most amazing group of friends. You knew you could trust them with anything and they were always there for you. You were also a really good friend back to them. I hope they’re still there and that the group has grown to include other people. But, if it hasn’t, don’t worry, it’s quality not quantity. 

You loved your new job. Yes, having a 6-day week seemed like a lot, but everyone was super nice and you always had a smile on your face. You were happy in your role, and lucky to find this place for your first job.

You were generally a very happy person. Remember when you were told you could basically see the sunlight shining from your eyes at 7:45 in the morning? That was a comment from a friend you had only just met, one of your best friends. I hope they are still in your life, they’ve made a big difference.

Now, a few goals I hope we’ll have achieved by the time you’re reading this. You’ll probably laugh at them but this is what you wanted…

Firstly, I hope we’ve become healthier. That’s never been our strong point, has it? But we’re starting to get there right now and I really hope we’ve continued it.

Secondly, I hope we’ve met lots of new people. We’ve spent too long keeping ourselves shut away, and have only really started to make new friends this year. All of these new people have made a big impact (some not so great but still) on our lives and we’d be such a different person without them. 

Thirdly, I hope we’ve stayed happy. This has been your best school-year and I hope your final year was/is even better. 

That’s it Debbi

Hello reader,
Today’s post was a bit more personal, maybe you learnt something about me from it? I have always enjoyed reading past diary entries to remember what my life was like at a certain time, and that is partially what this blog is for, but I’ve never aimed something specifically for me to read in the future, hence this post. Often I’ve seen people writing to their younger self and I considered that but I thought I’d much prefer to read this back in a year and reflect on the year gone by.
If you enjoyed reading this, why not give it a go? I’d love to read what you’d like to remind your future self about.
Speak soon x

Meditation

For just over a year now I’ve been a fan of meditation. It began when I was having cognitive behaviour therapy and meditation was recommended. I downloaded an app called stop, breathe, think that tailors meditations to suit your needs and I found that each day it would really help to make me feel calm and at peace.

More recently, I have been struggling to sleep and decided to try some sleep meditation at bedtime to help me drift into a peaceful slumber. I scoured YouTube to find a guided meditation that suited me and found the perfect one that I’d like to share with you all.

GUIDED SLEEP MEDITATION TALKDOWN – Insomnia – Relaxation is a 29-minute long guided meditation by TheHonestGuys. I’ve been using this nightly for the past couple of weeks and have only made it to the end once because it is that relaxing. In the comments section others say similar so it is clear this works for many people. If you are struggling to sleep, I would highly recommend this as it had completely changed my sleep patterns. Previously I was simply meditating to delta waves music but found that I would get to used to the music and would need to switch it up every couple of days to be able to actually sleep.

TheHonestGuys make many guided meditation videos that I intend to check out when I need them and I’ll be sure to let you all know how they work out.

That’s it for today folks, do you like to meditate? If so, is there anything you would recommend I check out?